Her Main Man

Her Main Man © Jon Davis 2019


It was great for while, I fell in love with her smile

But something told me it just wasn’t right

We’d hop into the sack and she’d spend time on her back

While sexting her men through the night


Every man and his dog; they all have her number

And look out when a band comes to town

Little ‘Cocaine Katy’ doesn’t act like a lady

And she treats me like I’m her old clown


Chorus

She’s got the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker

While she tells me that I’m her main man

She likes boys with big tools; she treats them all like her fools

And they play with her whenever they can


She makes fancy tucker; every man likes to … taste it

And she bakes things especially for me

Although her food is dericious, there’s something suspicious

Because every fella gets home delivery


There’s a big boat in town pulling into the dock

And the crowd hears her yell, “Ship ahoy”

Then she whispers to me, “You're my favourite one”

… I bet she says that to all the boys


Chorus

She’s got the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker

While she tells me that I’m her main man

She likes boys with big tools; she treats them all like her fools

And they play with her whenever they can


She has a plumber … and he cleans out her pipes

Then there’s the soldier who drives a big tank

Of course her sparky … well he lights up her nights

And then there’s me? I’m just her f****n bank…


She rubs it all in when she lands a new fella

To make me squirm and crush my self-esteem

She says she’ll be all mine, if I just give her time

But I won’t be a part of that ‘dream’


Chorus

She’s got the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker

While she tells me that I’m her main man

She likes boys with big tools; she treats them all like her fools

And they play with her whenever they can


She’s got the butcher, the baker, the candlestick maker

While she tells me that I’m her main man

Well it’s time to get goin’; I don’t care who she’s blowin’

I finally woke up to her plan…

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